cultivating mindfulness

while i was pregnant, david and i attended a mindfulness in childbirth class that came highly recommended by a good friend. she felt this class offered the most useful information of any prep course she took. we agreed.

knowing this, i decided to sign up for a new mom's mindfulness class. i was testing myself. and siena.

our daughter is what experts call "high needs;" certainly not the sort who would endure a 2-hour session that includes meditation. she requires lots of stimulation, movement, and constant changing of positions. we hold her a lot. we bounce her a lot. we walk her a lot. i can count the number of times i've held her (awake) while sitting: once today, a couple times on the porch, once earlier this week, and maybe a couple other times. and when i say "held her while sitting" i mean that i sat for longer than a couple minutes.

it was miraculous that she and i were able to attend this class. it's as if she too, were practicing the art of being mindful in that when we began a meditation exercise, she relaxed as i relaxed, and i was able to be present while attending to her. it was magical. when the facilitator asked us to share reflections, i was teary while admitting that i didn't expect i'd be able to participate in the exercise even partially. what a nice surprise.